The Thing about Receiving…

I’m just back from a joy-filled, heart-warming visit with my Mom. We played in a golf tournament, which really just gave me a semi-valid excuse to hop on a plane to go spend time with her.

While the golfing was fun, the conversations and laughter shared we far more memorable.

My previous post about being a Receiver came up, and I now better understand the impact to others on being a poor Receiver. Selfishly, I was only looking at the effect it’s had on my life. What I can now appreciate is what I taken from others in my act of not taking.

When we receive, we are receiving from someone. If there is a Receiver, then by default there is a Giver. There is someone, or some thing, that is actively, usually intentionally, giving the thing, gesture, or thought. What happens when we don’t receive though is that we don’t allow the Giver the emotional gratitude that comes with giving. If you want to treat someone to dinner, and they surreptitiously give the waiter their credit card, they have effectively turned you into the Receiver, taking away the opportunity for you to feel good about giving. Likewise, when you don’t actively listen to advice, even if you don’t heed it, you deprive the Giver the ability to feel like they are helping, let alone being heard.

I’ve been actively working on being a better Receiver. And what I’ve noticed is how much more present I am in conversation. I want the person that’s talking to me to feel like I appreciate their time and attention. And what’s pretty remarkable, what’s almost surprising, is how good it feels to receive. 

What are you working on receiving? I’d love to hear from you!