How To Accept Disappointment

It’s a Sunday, the one before Thanksgiving, and I find myself in my office. Sad. Teary. Alone.

The boys are at the movies. My daughter is playing with a friend. And here I am. I want to be reading a book in a bubble bath, but the time feels like it should be spent on reflecting. On looking back at a year what I thought was going to be transformative. One resplendent with successes and celebrations. Accomplishments and accolades. Instead, it was noticeably riddled with struggles and strife.

I thought that my game day shoe company, Lillybee, would find it’s footing. I thought I’d make more progress down the path of building Oak Lea Lane. I thought we’d be financial free. Those were my goals. What I worked towards all year. We’re 6 weeks from it being a New Year, and I’m no nearer to seeing success outside of walking up close to my vision board.

WHAT NOW?

What is it that we should do when things we hoped for, asked for, prayed for, and planned for don’t pan out? Do we acknowledge it to ourselves? Do we acknowledge it with others? If we concede defeat, what does that do to our belief system?

When a door we really wanted to enter has closed and we weren’t given the key, we need pause, feel and reflect. Then and only then can we can effectively stabilize, internalize, and recalibrate. In these BIG moments when we see our dreams lose their shape like watching clouds shift in the sky, it’s ok – it’s advantageous in fact – to mourn the loss of what we thought would come. It’s part of process. It’s how we grow. Loss is without learning if we don’t acknowledge it, accept it, and consciously decide to move beyond it. Sometimes the journey is painful. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t on the right path. Pain, when properly acknowledged, can lead to progress.

As we know, the Universe knows what is best for us. We have to give it up to God…even when it sucks and we shake our head in confusion because we (the mini-me that is ego-driven and self important) wants something else. The truth of Creation is that the Creator knows best. And that is the foundation of faith. We believe there is more to our life, more to all of Life, than just what we see. We believe first. Seeing comes after. Seeing eventually comes to even to those who never believed. But we believe now, in this human existence, because it gives us comfort. It gives us courage. And it give us the power to co-create with the Creator. But it does NOT give us control. At the end of the day, BECAUSE we are true believers, we trust in the timing of the Universe. WHATEVER that means!

When we fall short of success, we have to remember that ALL experiences are purposeful. That doesn’t mean that we don’t feel. We can and should feel regret, sadness, defeat, confusion, frustration. But also like passing clouds, emotions change.

So whatever you may be experiencing – loss, loneliness, health scares, professional disappointments, financial setbacks – acknowledge where you are. Accept where you are not. And let your feelings pass of wishing it looked different. When we embrace where we are, knowing what has and what hasn’t come before, we can truly find peace with the present. Because here, today, right where we are, however it looks, is right where we are meant to be.