Happy New Year one and all! I always find the beginning of a New Year exciting as we start with fresh slates. clean plates, and new hopes and goals for the future.
Like with the dawn of each morning, after we sleep, we have the ability to reset and recalibrate with new intentions, devotions, and commitments. With the beginning of each day, we have the ability to do differently than before. Similarly, with the start of each new year, we have the somewhat artificial but timely opportunity to intentionalize – to think with deliberation about what new or different we want for ourselves.
In years past, I made detailed lists of what I wanted to accomplish along with action plans for how I’d work to get there. This year is different though. Aside from clarity, I don’t know what I want. What I want is to know what it is that I want. Somehow I’m on the verge of turning 46, and for the first time in a long time, actually since I can remember, I don’t know my big goals.
- Perhaps this is because for the first time in 15 years, this is the very first New Year I’ve entered into without having a business to run. There is no SimplySoles, KassiesCloset, or Lillybee to nurture. All were sold. All have new owners. None need me.
- Perhaps this is because we are planning an around-the-world adventure, and simply surviving/enjoying the trip should the be primary focus of the year.
- Perhaps this is because I have a 4 story house to pack up and move before we catch our first international plane in mid-March, which gives me hives when I think about the time-consuming consequences of my hoarding habits.
But really, when I get quiet and think about what is happening deep within, I think I am presently goal-less because I am in the midst of a spiritual journey that needs some state of completion, or perhaps it’s a revelation, before my next phase of purposeful planning can begin. Something needs to happen first, and the only way of getting there and moving on, is by moving through. It needs time, whatever it even is.
So while my time is spoken for, without goals (as opposed to projects), it still feels a bit like aimless wandering. Perhaps though, at least in this case, without experiencing the unknown, we can’t recognize the known. Perhaps without the wonder of wandering, we won’t know when we are really there.
With loving gratitudes,